when popstars cheat

its easter, and mark owen is still in rehab.

who sets the price you have to pay for infidelity?
your therapist? the management?
the wife who was cheated upon?

or the girls who he cheated with?
his cheating, as i see it, could have been just another symptom.

in another newspaper article it was mentioned he has phases of melancholy and whispered "Help me" into his drink before going all boozy high.
high excitability and deep thoughts of sadness go hand in hand.
the wide ever-smiling grin seemingly genuine, just covering a possible depression?
underlined by extreme shyness.
its a recipe of regret.

bipolar? in a man? maybe?
but where can you find the cause? the source for such misery?

alcohol - excuse for self-destruction?
but why drink? why smoke? why have nerves to be tamed?
insecure?

for me it was my childhood, to many times being told what i'm doing wrong, and more than that, not being told when things go right. i drew back into my shell.
some have expectations to meet, and the fear to fail.

i think we all have our unique way to self-destruct.
and few find their way through.
transform negative energy into positive.

xx